Bad News, Good News, Bad News? (Attn: Bella and Marla)

[Craig]

<< At the Heart of It All Elia Darrow

The expedition to Vaidulo had not been what anyone had imagined. Apparently the events in Vaidulo had not been the only bad news to come out of this week, but it was the one most vivid in Elia's mind. She lay on the bed, both surprisingly still and quiet for the usually animated Indigo Aes Sedai. She was, as the Yellows had put it, 'under observation'. She'd been in the room for only an hour or so, yet she had settled into the monotony and silence well.

Saidar was being used nearby. Saidar was always being used somewhere within range of her whilst in the Grey Tower, but it felt different now. She hadn't touched the Source since Vaidulo. That had only been this evening. It was still the same evening. It also felt like a lifetime ago.

Malachite green eyes overlooked the torn, soaked and bloody dress she had on. The Elia-before-Vaidulo would have been appalled at her appearance. Now she didn't see any of it. Her gaze only noticed one thing, and it seemed like the only thing that was important in the whole world.

The feeling of movement from her arm seemed far removed from the blackened limb that lifted itself into view. The skin was mottled in dark browns and ashen black, and looked withered. It could have been the arm of a corpse left on a midden heap for months, except it wasn't. As she bid her fingers to flex, the bone-thin digits moved. The gesture brought with it a subtle aching pain.

Elia jumped when the door to the room opened. She calmed when she recognised the Asha'man, offering him a weak smile. "I wasn't infected," she stated quietly. The Shienaran made no attempt to bully or protest; all of the headstrong determination that defined her was absent in her tone and body language.

She looked beyond Gareth into the wider infirmary, hoping not to see a particular someone. His face appeared whenever she closed her eyes.

Elia's gaze returned to the Yellow Asha'man's face, then to her decayed arm. "Can you do anything for me?"

[Bella]

To say that Gareth was glad to be home would be an understatement.

Although even though he would say that, there was a part of him that thought the Grey Tower wasn't far enough away from the village of Vaidulo and all the horrors that it contained. He wanted to forget everything that he had seen both above ground and below; in fact, he wanted to forget everything he hadn't seen too.

There was a part of him that wanted to get every Earthsinger in the Tower and take them back to that place, then bury it deep in the ground. Make every rock of the underground lair pull in on itself and the whole town sink beneath the dirt until there was nothing left but bad memories and bad dreams.

However, he knew that was not what he was meant to be doing now. Now, he had a duty to perform. He was a Yellow, a healer, among the best in the Tower. He had people to help.

He knew that Dedicated Nathaniel was going to need...a lot of help. For now, let him sleep while they all caught their breaths. He would get to him soon enough. At the moment, he was at the door of the Indigo that had been down there with the young man. He didn't want to imagine what she had been through, but the glimpses had been enough.

He knocked softly, then entered Elia's room. She spoke. He listened. Moving nearer, he took a seat next to her bed. "I will need to Delve you. Do I have your permission?"

At her slight nod, he seized Saidin. It was actually a small miracle he'd been able to make himself let it go since leaving the village, but now he had it back in hand. He looked at her hand and his face betrayed no reaction. Gareth was a Healer and had seen many things, although if forced to admit it, this was the first time he'd seen a desiccated hand on a still-living body.

This weave was almost second nature to him; he probably could do it in his sleep. It settled over her whole body, but he started "looking" at the arm first. He saw the internal artifacts of the damage done, and the remnants of Healing. That made him wince inwardly, but he kept his face impassive as he took inventory of the rest of her.

At one point, he "saw" something that surprised him. He blinked and then gave a slight shake of his head and kept looking.

This just turned into a more complicated encounter, he thought as finished his Delving and let the weave go. He was quiet for a moment before he met her eyes. There was compassion in his pale gaze. "I am afraid, Aes Sedai, I cannot fix your arm. They were...able to be thorough in that. I think they wanted to assure that none could change it." He paused. "I am sorry."

There was more to tell, but he wanted to give her a moment to absorb that first.

[Craig]

Elia

"I am afraid, Aes Sedai..."

Elia didn't need to hear anymore to know what she was being told. Gareth's voice faded into the battleground, as did everything else, as the Indigo saw the rotten arm and nothing else. She couldn't accept this fate. Even seeing the limb react to her movements, Elia could not recognise it as her own.

There was a sudden spike in her awareness of everything, although she thought of nothing but her arm. Threads of woven light appeared in the air around her, luminous in shades of silver and white and gold. She wove with practice, interweaving the cords of Air and Spirit around the construct of Water. Gareth's tone became a little more intrusive but Elia pressed on regardless. The weave of Healing drifted down into the Aes Sedai's arm...

...and nothing.

The Shienaran's next action was as startling to her as it was to Gareth. She took a hold of his shirt with her good arm and wrenched him towards her. Green eyes looked up into dull grey. "Please, don't leave me like this, please! There must be something else. Whatever you Yellows have come up with, I accept. You're Healers right? So please, just..."

Words turned to ash in her mouth. Two arms were gripped hold of the Asha'man's clothes. She could feel them both, and see them both, but...

Slowly, the slender fingers on one of her hands loosened in parallel with the shrivelled digits. This, this was not a dream. The two hands hovered in the space between Elia and Gareth as tears started to form in the younger's eyes.

"Please."

[Bella]

With his skill and training, his dedication to his work that had brought to know so much about his craft in all its many facets, One Power and conventional, Gareth did not have to give truly bad news all that often. It was a relief to him, because no matter how he hardened himself against, it hurt to do.

He was, at his very core, a gentle man. No one ever thought it when they met him, seeing his size and not the most handsome of faces, but it was true and always had been.

"Aes Sedai," he said, gently in his low voice. "Elia." He dared her name, but found that while the title bore respect it did not always break through painful hazes. "If I could do anything to help you, I would. Please believe that." And as he was an Oathsworn, it was true. He would go to many lengths to help people, and it was...deeply disturbing now that he could do nothing for her.

The other things lingered, but he would not tell her until he was assured of her calm and receptivity. For now, he had to let her react to this and deal with the moment as best she could. He not help her to do that either, not much at least, but to be there and to listen.

[Craig]

Elia

Elia collapsed back onto the bed as tears rolled down her cheeks. She was, maybe for the first time ever, utterly defeated. There were no more cards to be dealt, and Gareth and his Ajah had nothing even in charity to offer her.

"So this is it?" she asked dully. Disgusted, she slipped the mutilated arm underneath a sheet so she didn't have to see it. There was still the pain though. She couldn't hide that from herself. "I'm just going to remain with this forever? You can't...?" The words died. They can't, she repeated to herself. And you can't do anything either.

Elia tugged the blankets and sheets until they settled underneath her chin. She wanted to disappear. She was defective. What use would anyone have for her now?

Gareth was still hovering. Elia looked up expectantly, even though he had already delivered his verdict. "What is it?"

[Bella]

Gareth watched her and knew that she had a very long road ahead of her, in more ways than just figuring out what to do about that hand. It would be a hard process, and he hoped she would manage it. Especially for the reasons he was about to divulge. Her met her gaze once more as she looked at him.

"There was something else I found when I Delved. There is a minor head injury that I can Heal, and request your permission to do since you are cognizant. But there was something else."

He paused. He struggled to imagine how this could possibly be a good time for such news, but he didn't hesitate long because that would just be cruel. "Aes Sedai, you're pregnant." There. It was said. He wondered how she would take the news on top of the rest, but he would tried to be prepared for anything...

[Craig]

Elia

Pregnant. That was the lesser of the evening's two discoveries. Elia's hands seemed to slide towards her stomach of their own accord. "Are you certain?" she asked, but of course he was. The three metals of the Oathsworn pin sat clear as day on his coat.

She thought about how this had happened, beyond the glaring obvious. She drank heartleaf tea like any rational woman in her situation would. More than a normal person, in fact, due to how much she had feared this from happening. She could be many things and wear many a mask, but motherhood was a step in the unknown.

"How long?" she asked. There were limited options when it came to the father, but a tighter timeframe would help with addressing that. She didn't want to think about how any of those conversations would go, whether it was with a swarthy Altaran or a knavish Tairen or someone else. Light, that those first two were the best outcomes didn't say much.

Pain shot through the Indigo's arm. A moment later, Elia had a question for Gareth, which she delivered it with uncharacteristic flatness. "Is the baby alright?"

[Bella]

He watched her carefully, but her reaction to this wasn't as dramatic as the other...which could be a good sign or a bad sign, but for now, he could only react to what he saw before him. He'd answer the questions. "Roughly two months," he said. "Possibly a little less. It's still early yet, but it is far enough along for me to tell..."

After the briefest of hesitations, he said, "That it's twins. There are two babies. And as far as I can tell, they are fine but it is still early."

[Craig]

Elia

She breathed a tempered sigh of relief. Two babies were two too many, yet it brought her some comfort knowing they were alright. That had to be today's silver lining.

Elia faced the Asha'man once again. "Thank you Gareth." She thought it should have felt strange to thank someone for not helping, but this time it didn't. As the Yellow made his way out, Elia lay back again and emptied her mind. There were too many things to consider and analyse. She just needed a little bit of piece and quiet. A little bit of nothingness into which she could abandon all of her concerns, if only for the duration of this instant.

The solitude did not last, but Elia knew it never could. She looked towards the doorway, catching the shadowy signs of someone standing outside the door. There was a knock just before the door opened. It was Chistianne, one of the Sitters for the Yellows. "There's a young man looking for you," she declared as the Andoran pushed a man into view. Elia's eyes widened at the sight of her new visitor. "Dax?!"

[Sunny]

Dax

Something drew Dax to the Infirmary. Perhaps it was the look in Elia’s eyes when he had kept her from falling to the filthy ground beneath Viadulo; that was the only explanation that fit into how the Tairen preferred to perceive the world and thus that was the one he chose to cling to. You are an idiot, Jem told him sharply. He didn’t need the reminder; instead of responding, he simply pretended to close a door on his brother’s face.

Of course, once he arrived at the Infirmary reluctance kicked in. The Aes Sedai had astutely avoided him since their encounter in Hama Valon, to the extent of riding a purposeful distance away from him when they went to the haunted village. What good would it do to insist on being in her presence? Eventually his reluctance won out. Instead of going into the room Elia had been assigned, Dax settled outside of it with his back pressed against the wall at apparent indolent ease.

He might have stayed there forever if not for Christianne Trakand. The Yellow listened to his excuses, then with implacable firmness insisted he either leave (“The Aes Sedai does not need a guard in our Infirmary, Gaidin”) or go inside. She did not have much patience for him to take his time deciding; when he did not immediately leave, she grabbed his arm and hauled him through the door.

Thus thoroughly unprepared, Dax found himself facing Elia alone. She did not seem angry to see him, though her shock was quite evident in the way she yelped his name. I suppose anyone who knows anything about me would be shocked to see me here. “That is my name, yes,” was all he said aloud, a smile drifting across his face.

“I wanted to be sure you are safe and well,” he added. “Everyone is in rather a tizzy about Nate, but I-” he cut off as his eyes fell to her arm, noticing no change from the last time he had seen it. “Light,” he said softly. “They couldn’t Heal you?”