A Patch of Grass (Attn: Cal)

[Craig]

Sabine ni Hayadan t'Masin

Everyone had their favourite part of the gardens. It was a place of such vibrant wonder, with flowers and trees from all nine corners of the world. There were benches along the side of the lake to take in the beauty, or paths that meandered through thickets of colourful flora. Some novices and soldiers risked damaging their clothes by sneaking off the treaded paths into tiny nooks. They seemed like sacred sanctuaries, a place of actual privacy, unlike the rooms they had to double-up in.

Little balls of light floated around in one of these pockets between the trees, dancing in between branches of a leatherleaf, then swooshing around into figures of eight or spinning around like small balls in the hand of a gleeman. Sabine lay on her back, moving her fingers in rhythm with the orbs, their movement being directed with the One Power. The touch of saidar soothed her soul, as did the artistic motions she conducted. She knew that channelling without supervision was forbidden, but she needed this retreat from everything. The last few months had borne witness to a living hell, and the same had happened the year prior to that. When a building of stone crumbled to dust, and when a town burned all around you, it was hard to feel safe.

At last she ended her performance, as the balls of light seemed to fly into her hand. With a reluctance that she knew was dangerous, Sabine let saidar go, a murmur of discontent leaving her lips. She closed her eyes, letting her fingers feel along the blades of grass underneath her. The ground and the sky were real things she could understand. Her motivations for staying at the Grey Tower were something new and altogether confusing. Letting go of her oaths had torn a hole in her soul that she was unsure how to mend, although with time both betrayals were getting easier to bear.

The sounds of branches being pushed aside nearby made the novice peer around, although her head and body remained stationary. If she was about to be happened upon by an Accepted, to get her into yet more trouble, then Sabine was going to enjoy every last second of this peace whilst it lasted.

[Cal]

Zuin pushed his way through the branches of the bush, careful not to let his black coat snag on the branches. The last thing he wanted right now was to rip his coat and be forced to explain why. I wandered off the path and through some bushes to see some flying orbs I think I saw in some bushes. didn't exactly have the making of a good excuse. Not that he had much practise at making up good excuses, he had always been content to sit in the library of the house rather than go making trouble.

As he pushed out of the bushes he saw a girl in a Novice dress lying down on the grass in the little clearing, peering around her to see what the noise had been. He was fairly sure it was him that had made the noise and for a moment he considered turning back before the girl saw him but he pushed the thought aside and went one, he was curious as to what the lights he had seen had been and wanted to know what they had been. He supposed she could have been channelling the orbs but Novices and Soldiers weren't supposed to channel without supervision. He stood behind the girl in the clearing, not knowing what to say so standing awkwardly instead cursing himself for his lack of knowledge about what to do in these situations.

[Craig]

Sabine

Sabine peered towards the upside down form of a black-suited soldier, who stopped at the edge of the clearing. She tried discerning what she could from this angle -- a useless endeavour -- before sitting up and twisting around. One hand supported her, whilst she checked that the ribbons holding her hair in a bun hadn't come loose. Satisfied, she rose up to her feet to get a proper look.

The newcomer stood a few inches below her, although he was no Cairhienin. Youth was his detriment; he maybe had some room left to growth yet. Brown hair flopped over onto one side of his head, and he looked... young. There did not seem to be much else to say on the matter.

Ink black eyes regarded his nervousness. There had been a time when Sabine would have called out the boy for staring like a country farmhand, but Aes Sedai were meant to be diplomatic and serene. The thought still seemed foreign to her. One hand dropped to where her dagger had once sat, stolen and presumably lost forever. Not that she wanted the weapon, but it spoke to who she once was. No more.

The Saldaean could do serenity, when it suited. She bobbed a slight curtsey, just enough to be polite, before approaching the boy. She even put a hand out in greeting. "Sabine ni Hayadan t'Masin," she inflected in a noble tone. "May I ask what you are doing here?" Well, she had serenity down; diplomacy she would have to work towards.

[Cal]

Zuin studied the girl who now stood in front of him. She was taller than he was but not much too much with long dark hair. He noticed her black, intense eyes and started. He hand never seen black eyes before except on the shadowspawn he had studied in pictures and books. But this girl was no shadowspawn her was sure. She sounded Boarderlander to him with that name and accent although he couldn't be sure, he had never been made to learn about other nations and had been left to his own studies. From the way she held herself and spoke he guessed she was either a noble or a long time Novice with remarkable self control.

He bowed slightly in response to he curtsey, his bow probably deeper than it strictly needed to be but that couldn't be helped now. He shook her hand as he introduced himself. "Zuin Faera. I came over when I saw your orbs. I'd never seen anything like them before so I can to see what they were. Sorry if I disturbed you." He bowed his head slightly as he cursed himself over and over inside his head. He sound like a bumbling country idiot. If his father had been there and headed him... Well it didn't matter. He was away from his father and that life with better prospects than he had had before.

[Craig]

Sabine

Sabine's arm lingered in the air a moment after their handshake. "There is no need for apologies." A good thing the Saldaean was not an Aes Sedai, or else the lie may not have been so easy. "You have not seen how to weave light before? Come, sit down." She pointed to a spot on the ground, then folded her legs beneath her, careful to keep any skin from showing.

She thought of the little white flowers called candytufts as she sought out the One Power. As their little heads opened in the light, Sabine surrendered herself to the Creator, letting saidar fill her like an empty vessel. Very little of the Power was required to form the small orbs of light, Fire folded within spheres of Air. Soon a few small balls began to spin around the two trainees like stallions in a corral.

Sabine had no fear of Zuin reporting her to the Mistress of Novices, or she at least stifled that worry behind other emotions. "I'd never seen anything like them" He was new, or new enough not to know of Sabine ni Hayadan t'Masin, one of the novices who had miraculously been absent when the Novices' Quarters were attacked. That was the real reason she danced green and blue lights around them; made the purple ones leap over their heads; let the red ones come together in a large globe of swirling shades from crimson to pink, then burst apart again.

They were all just simple tricks made to entertain, but she needed to make inroads with people again. Almost all of her friends had died, a pain she forced down, and everyone else treated her with no small amount of suspicion. Memories retreated as she focused on the present. Zuin's bluish-green eyes watched the orbs in amazement, and Sabine wrinkled her nose in satisfaction. It had been too long since she has seen a warm expression on another person's face.

"You are new, correct? And not channelling for long?" She knew the answers to both questions, saying he did not know how to make simple lights. Her tone turned serious. "You should know that I am not well liked here, at the Tower, amongst the soldiers and novices. You may not wish to be seen with me." He had some right to know. The boy was maybe five or so years younger than her, and she had the extra years of experience to deal with loneliness and rejection. Someone would find a way to make her sorry, should some similar fate befall Zuin.

[Cal]

Zuin sat where Sabine motioned, his legs crossed. He was grateful that the girl didn't seem angry with him for interrupting her. He watched as she seemed to relax and then felt his skin prickle. Even with only a few weeks here he had learned that the prickle was the sign of a female embracing the Source. He shivered slightly at the feeling before seeing the coloured orbs appear around them.

For a few moments he lost himself in the flying coloured orbs. He started when she suddenly spoke. It took him a moment to process what she had asked him. "Yeah, I'm new. I've only been channelling for about three weeks." He replied as hell watched the orbs dance around them.

Then she spoke again. This time he didn't nearly miss what she said. "It doesn't really matter to me, I've always been a bit of an outcast. My father or brothers never had time for me so I spent my time alone. Even one person to talk too would be better than that." He said a slight note of bitterness in his voice. It was for his father or brothers but himself. He was the weak one it made sense that they left him out while they focused on more important matters. It was his own fault, if only he could have been stronger, harder, tougher. He sighed slightly to himself, it wasn't ever going to happen.

"Why do they not like you?" He asked partly to distract himself and partly because it peaked his curiosity.

[Craig]

Sabine

The orbs slowed and dimmed as her forehead creased. "There are a number of our peers who think I am a Darkfriend." Sabine expressed that in a pained tone, a far cry from the high-pitched incredulity that had originally responded to the first time the claim was made. Her lips twisted sourly. The only thing worse than being labelled a Darkfriend was to be a Darkfriend. Sabine thought she saw doubt and disbelief cover Zuin's face. No-one openly said such a thing and thought anything positive would come out from it.

The Saldaean's voice took on more strength the longer she spoke. "There was an attack on the Grey Tower a few months ago. You may have heard; if not, you will have seen. The big hole and pile of ruins south of the Tower? That used to be where all of the novices and soldiers were quartered. An Aes Sedai--" she did not dare say that it was the last Mistress of Novices "--caused the entire building to crumble, with most of the rooms still filled with people." Her mouth twisted again. "I happened to be outside the building at the time. I was... trying to escape Hama Valon during the attack." She spread her hands in regret. "It was foolhardy to try and run away, but that is the only crime I am guilty of. I played no part in the devastation."

The lights had been fading away through the conversation, and with a number of twinkling sparks, they all vanished at once. Abjection filled her as saidar vanished just as suddenly as the lights did. Her shoulders slumped, and her stomach felt empty. She was innocent of those suspicions aimed at her, but a fear of being discovered still clawed away inside her. Innocent of one crime. Not of another. She could not even feign a smile to hide behind.

"We can be outcasts together," she said without any enthusiasm or humour. She looked soberly at Zuin. "If you are not put off being in the presence of a... Darkfriend."

[Cal]

Zuin studied the girl carefully. He very much doubted she was a Darkfriend. More likely she was genuinely innocent. In his knowledge Darlfriends were generally more clever than to try and escape even as another committed at act such as the one she had described. It drew too much attention to them. "I don't think you are a Darkfriend although if you are then you aren't the brightest. Trying to escape while an accomplice kills people only draws attention to you. No I think you were just unlucky in the timing of your escape attempt."

It was brutally honest but true. If she was a Darkfriend then she was stupid. It was simple. She would have been better off finding some other reason not be in the Novice's Quarters.

"Besides that, you sounded and look genuinely pained by the accusations when you told me of them just now." Zuin added, what he didn't add was that any real Darkfriend would most likely be able to act well enough to fool him. He had never been a good judge of people, another of his many failings.

"Why were you trying to escape anyway? Don't you like it here? He asked to move the subject away from Darkfriends. Anything would be better than that topic. He was genuinely curious about it. He couldn't see a reason for wanting to leave but then he hadn't been here for long, to him everything was still new and exciting. A person could learn so much here but that only suited some people, for others they simply wanted to learn control. Maybe she was one of those people but somehow he doubted it. After all she was out her using the Power to create pretty lights. If she wanted control she wouldn't want to know how to do extra things with the power, only how to do that basics. He could be wrong thought. It wouldn't be the first time he misjudged somebody so badly.

[Craig]

Sabine

Sabine's lips pulled down in a less than amused way. It was one thing to come out and refer to what everything was thinking, but it was another to insult her intelligence as a separate fault. Zuin probably did not mean it that way, but she had good reason to be tetchy.

"I did not," she replied in a coolly arrogant tone. Saying she was not bright. Her education had been the finest in Saldaea; her education in the Tower something else altogether. "I came to the Grey Tower with a friend, in the interest of acquiring knowledge, nothing more. She asked to be tested, and was found wanting. I did not ask to be tested." The rest Zuin could infer. That the former Mistress of Novices -- the Darkfriend -- had been wrong about Fiona's ability with the One Power was an even more infuriating fact than that the raven-haired Aes Sedai had latched onto her, a woman with no interest in the One Power or Aes Sedai or the Grey Tower. Yet, it was no use denying that she did have the ability to channel, and she understood now the dangers of not being taught. Still, the memory smarted.

She continued, more matter-of-fact than cold iron. "I attempted to escape the city with a couple of other novices. I cannot recall much about what happened afterwards." The last sentence was a lie, to a point. She and Casey and Lia had made it to Hama Valon unimpeded. They had changed out of novice whites, and had a scheme to escape through one of the smaller gates. I also killed a man. The memory physically pained her, like shards of ice thrust into her heart. Yet the Saldaean kept the pain from her voice. That had been a necessity, or had seemed it at the time.

After... that, Sabine could not recall what had happened. She had made it to the gate, or near enough, and then nothing. The Yellows suspected the memories may not return, with the injuries to the back of her head. Healed so there was no scar, but still, nothing to say what had happened to her, nor what had happened with Casey and Lia. "They could be gone or dead." The words slipped out carelessly, but no longer with the regret of not being with them.

"But that is in the past. I am here to stay now." With that she opened herself to saidar again, and the coloured balls reappeared, if not quite as lively as before. Eight of them, one for each of the Ajahs, aside from Black. It was only rumour that Mirin Ronaile, the former Mistress of Novices, served a 'Black Ajah', but the rumours were thick and fierce. Even Dedicated and Ji'val did not bother to deny it.

"How about you, Zuin? What brought you to the Grey Tower? Dreams of being an Asha'man?"

[Cal]

Zuin took it all in silence. He suspected there was more to it, there always was, but he didn't pry. She obviously didn't want to tell him and he wasn't going to force it. There was no point in pushing the girl.

He thought about her question. He first though had been to say a gateway but he assumed that she wouldn't fine that smart response funny so he held it in. Instead he said "I killed twenty men when they attacked my carriage. I ripped them apart with the One Power before they knew what was happening. That night I was will and the next time I was properly aware I was here, in the infirmary." There was no warmth or emotion in his voice.

He didn't regret his actions. He hadn't been able to help them but that didn't change the fact that there were now twenty dead men lying scattered in a field in Andor. He didn't feel guilt over it either. It was there fault that he had done it, if they hadn't attacked then he wouldn't have retaliated. He had to admit that they had no way of knowing that he could channel but they shouldn't have been trying to rob people. The fact he had killed them simply meant that the guards didn't have to. They would have been dead by the end of the year. He had only sped up the process.

He watched her face to see he reaction. He was never sure how people would react to the fact he had killed people. He knew he should probably hide the fact but he felt guilty not telling people. It was part of who he was and they should know what they were dealing with.