The Talk (Attn: Lugh)

[Craig]

Ravak

The minimal curving of Ravak's lips was hidden by his shaggy beard. "No. A Warder doesn't get the option whether to feel what their Aes Sedai feels, although they can choose to mute the bond. Being bonded goes beyond any other commitment you may have made. You are constantly in one another's heads. Their emotions can overflow into you and make you act in ways you normally wouldn't, and vice versa. Just as your own emotions affect you dependent on their intensity, so too does your channeller's. And yes, it certainly can be a distraction, but that's the purpose or benefit of the ko'di."

"You can feel their pain as well, although not as if you were the one suffering." Ravak scratched an itch below his left eye before continuing. "A woman suffers unusual pains compared to a man's. It can be... unpleasant and distracting. Imagine being ill all the time, except that your body is hale and hearty."

Rav leaned forward, but only so he could peer down at his right hand. He took a hold of the gold ring on his shorn finger. Again twisting it a few times, he settled back in the chair again.

"I've never suffered the feeling of what happens when a bond breaks, but I've seen the effects." He looked directly at Beron. "Death is not certain, but it is certainly preferable to the alternatives." Rav cast his gaze elsewhere. "Of course, the whole purpose of being a bonded Gaidin is to protect your bondmate. I doubt the dangers of a broken bond can be removed, else someone would have discovered it by now, but it emphasises what is important: your life before hers."

Ravak turned to Beron again. "The strength and stamina is not 'worth the trade'. Don't think of the bond as a transaction, unless you're comfortable handing over your very life for benefits that will never amount to a grain of rice in comparison. You become your bondmate's shield and sword. You will inflict pain simply because it is asked of you, and you will endure pain simply because it is asked of you, and you'll have no true power to resist."

In the distance, Miahala's mood had shifted. Clearly he was no longer in need of her presence, although her concern and curiosity still bubbled in the back of his mind. I'll need to explain myself after this.

Ravak snorted quietly before a broad grin covered his face. "Have I scared you from becoming a Warder yet, or do you still want to know what benefits there are? No-one would judge you if you found the whole concept frightful at this point."

[Lugh]

Beron

Beron was curious to learn that channelers could mute the bond from their Warders, but not the other way around. And while the idea of emotions being constantly projected seemed like it could be troublesome; he had seen a few bonded couples in action and there had appeared to be ways to learn to deal with it. Otherwise the bonded channelers would not rise so high in the Grey Tower ranks.

"You can feel their pain as well, although not as if you were the one suffering." Ravak scratched an itch below his left eye before continuing. "A woman suffers unusual pains compared to a man's. It can be... unpleasant and distracting. Imagine being ill all the time, except that your body is hale and hearty.” Beron coughed as Ravak finished his statement, while he would not pretend to be an expert, the monthly pains that could bother a woman were less foreign to a man who had lived with sisters, and animals in heat.

"I've never suffered the feeling of what happens when a bond breaks, but I've seen the effects." He looked directly at Beron. "Death is not certain, but it is certainly preferable to the alternatives." Rav cast his gaze elsewhere. "Of course, the whole purpose of being a bonded Gaidin is to protect your bondmate. I doubt the dangers of a broken bond can be removed, else someone would have discovered it by now, but it emphasises what is important: your life before hers."

“I chose my words poorly Gaidin, I did not mean to make the bond sound like a merchant hawking goods at the fair. I suppose my words were poorly chosen simply because it is something hard to reference if you have never seen it,” Beron stated as the meaning of the words Ravak was sharing began to distill into him.

Ravak snorted quietly before a broad grin covered his face. "Have I scared you from becoming a Warder yet, or do you still want to know what benefits there are? No-one would judge you if you found the whole concept frightful at this point."

Beron took a moment to seriously weigh the words Ravak had shared. He had known that being a Warder meant putting her life for his, and he had seen other men take the oath since arriving at the Grey Tower. To draw when you say draw, to sheath when you say sheath. Till the Mother’s embrace enfolds me once more. Beron tried very hard to seperate his feelings for Isla from the feelings over bonding. He knew he would most likely offer her his blade and service, but the bond seemed potent and powerful enough that the Grey Tower would need him elsewhere.
Not all bond holders mate, although it would take a strong woman to knowingly share such a life, Beron thought. For himself he had little worries about the pain and violence, he had chosen to fight the Shadow and staked his support of the Grey Tower for that very reason.

Sitting forward, he smiled to Ravak, “No Gaidin you have not scared me off. I was born to a family that has long served along the Blight. When I joined the army I risked death in the war against the Shadow. I knew there would be violence and pain as I signed the roster, and my Test showed me glimpses of the sacrifice required to be Ji’val. I would hear more. I still plan to serve as Gaidin and Warder, it’s just become very clear why it is not something to rush headlong into.”

[Craig]

Ravak

Ravak nodded in silent assent. "The benefits then. Increased stamina is certainly a part of it. There will be times when it is necessary to keep your bondmate safe at all hours. Between the bond and the One Power, it is possible to remain alert and awake for days at a time, although there are limits. Push yourself too far and you will leave both yourself and your bondmate vulnerable.

"They say that strength can come from the bond as well, although I'm not personally aware of it. It won't allow you to skip out on the physical training you're already going through. It takes more than rainbows in the air to make a person into a Warder."

"There are three other benefits that come immediately to my mind." He counted them off on his fingers. "First, you can recover from more grievous injuries than a normal man, and at a quicker pace too. Second, you know where your bondmate is at all times, unless they suppress the bond. And three, you begin to get a sense of Shadowspawn. It's different from how you know your bondmate, but it's similar." Ravak waved his hand. "It's hard to explain, and it's never wholly reliable. Again, bonding doesn't make a Warder; training does... and a bond."

[Lugh]

Beron

Beron has heard the gleemen and rumours about the benefits Warders enjoyed. The stamina of many men, never sleeping, and other abilities had sounded like the sort of spices a gleeman added to any tale. To have Ravak set the record straight was good, it gave him a truer sense of what to expect. And was still impressive.

“The Aes Sedai and Warder I helped scout, because we were in haste she used some part of the One Power to wipe away our fatigue. I had noticed that she was unable to do so for herself,” Beron mentioned as Ravak’s words made him think.

It was also very clear that despite their anger and their views at the beginning of their talk, Ravak was a man who took the bond seriously. He understood the not so subtle distinction Ravak was making when he spoke of holding a bond, and being a trained Warder who worked with a bonded partner. Two halves of a whole, her life before yours. It will be the work of a lifetime to develop the relationship to the point both truly benefit. Light it’s a good thing I am working on skills beyond just my sword tip or dagger blade. Beron mused to himself.

Beron almost asked how they expected the Learning ranks to realize they were ready for a bond if they could not spend much time with each other, but he bit his tongue. That came too soon on the heels of the argument that began this talk, and Beron wanted to learn more than he wanted to twist Ravak’s nose. “How did you and your bondmate come to be..” Beron asked and quickly held his hand up to forestall embarrassment, “Sorry Gaidin, I do not mean to pry into marriage, I just wonder how you realized your paths would be stronger intertwined?”

[Craig]

Ravak

Why did I decide to be bonded with Mia? Well, there was a good question. He stroked his beard as he thought about the first couple of answers that came to mind. Both were unsuitable given his rant mere moments ago.

"I've been bonded twice," he lied, "and both times there was an alignment of interests. There are many ways to put your swords to use, and ways to put your mind to use as well. With Miahala, well, we're both Borderlanders. I was raised in Fal Dara, and my childhood was all about joining the army and fighting the Shadow. That's what we do, fight the monsters so that the world is safe, so a second Malkier never comes to pass. But it's more than that. We have shared values. Our personalities complement one another's."

"There's also acceptance." Rav pursed his lips, reasoning with himself on how much to say. There was a strength in honesty. "I've made mistakes in my past, some even within the recent past. Keeping secrets from your bondmate is a path to disaster, so you have to be open. You have to lay yourself bare and accept their judgement of you, and pray that judgement doesn't leave them wanting more. That sort of resentment will eat away at the both of you."

Reaching back, Ravak rubbed at the back of his neck. "As I said, I've had two bondmates. There's a reason I'm on number two."

[Lugh]

Beron

Bonded twice? With what Ravak said about the death of a bondmate, I wonder if she did not survive Beron thought to himself as he was surprised by Ravak’s honest answer.

He listened intently as Ravak described his bond with Miahala. It made a lot of sense that the bond worked with intention and interests paired. Being from the Borderlands himself, Beron could well imagine how useful a Warder of Ravak’s caliber would be to the infamous Miahala Sedai.

“I can see why open acceptance would be a major part of it Gaidin. If I was decieving my bondmate, or trying to hide deeds I was ashamed of; there would be little point with a person who can feel my emotions as their own. With the trials and dangers facing the Grey Tower at every turn, a Bond with the wrong person would quickly cause issues. I had known before meeting with you that the bond was a serious thing, and part of why our training is so long. But there are brambles on the paths I had not considered until now. Thank you Ravak Gaidin,” Beron offered his thanks sincerely. He was no less determined than before, and the idea of building up the Grey Tower and his future still brought him back to Isla, but he knew a lot more of the pitfalls than he had before.

“I know the Ajah’s help steer each Sister or Ashaman towards common goals and that as a bonded Gaidin supporting those goals would be key. Aiding my bondmate as she accomplished goals. But for the unbonded Gaidin, I know there is no Ajahs, so is the training of future Gaidin their main goal? It is something I had not considered before now.”

[Craig]

Ravak

"You know, I did suggest that Gaidin should be able to join Ajahs." To say that the concept had been met with resistance was to suggest that the Aiel Waste was a bit sandy. "But the purpose of Gaidin has always been the same. We serve the Grey Tower, and even unbonded, we are still swords and shields for our channellers. Even without a bondmate, you'll find your time as a Gaidin busy. Of course, a part of it is training the learning ranks. If that's something you wish to specialise in, you can. Others prefer the freedom to travel far and wide as part of various Grey Tower expeditions. Some like to work with specific channellers, in order to get to know them well before considering a bond. So long as you're serving the Tower, what you do is up to you, within reason."

"My own path moved through the offices of the Warder Council. That's another path you can take if you wish to bear the mantle of authority. Ultimately I think being Gaidin allows for a lot more freedom. Your path is your own, until or if you desire to settle down for a bondmate."

[Lugh]

Beron

Beron bit his lip to keep from chortling as he imagined how that conversation must have gone. He knew little about Grey Tower politics, but what he had learned since arriving here was that the Hall could be hidebound.

“I myself have probably met as many unbonded Gaidin as bonded. I had not considered how many duties the unbonded Gaidin would perform,” Beron said as they discussed teaching the Learning Ranks, patrolling the Citadel and the never ending twisting nest of enemies squared off against the Grey Tower.

"My own path moved through the offices of the Warder Council. That's another path you can take if you wish to bear the mantle of authority. Ultimately I think being Gaidin allows for a lot more freedom. Your path is your own, until or if you desire to settle down for a bondmate." Ravak finished, and Beron oddly realized he was glad for the conversation.

“I can tell you plainly, my romantic feelings were not why I had asked for a conversation on the bond, and you have given me a lot to think on.” Beron still felt deep down that he was called to be a bonded Warder, but there would be a lot to talk about when the time to discuss a bond arose.

Spoiler: show

OOC: Thanks for the awesome thread Craig. I think I’ll close it off here, and move to Beron receiving his penance.

[Craig]

Ravak

Ravak pushed down on the arms of the chair as he rose to his feet. His fancloak unfurled between the sheaths of his two blades. His voice was soft and compassionate. "Good. You should think on it. Don't go bolting out of the gate with the first channeller to find." Ravak grinned; that was precisely what he had done, but others had to learn from his experience, right?

He walked to the door, placing a hand on the handle. "Report to the Mistress of Training," Ravak said over his shoulder. "I'll know if you don't." With that, the Gaidin opened the door and stepped silently into the corridor, leaving Beron to his thoughts and transgressions.